The operators of Riverbend Landfill are not sitting idle while waiting for LUBA, the state Land Use Board of Appeals, to decide whether Yamhill County was wrong to reject its expansion application.
The landfill has taken the laudable step of offering its 96 acres as a mass vaccination site.
"We want to do the right thing for the County," a Riverbend spokesperson explained, "just as we did in the mid-2000's with our failed Stewardship Lands project. And since Metro stopped sending its waste our way in 2020, we have plenty of open space," the spokesperson added.
According to a Riverbend press release, eligible people will register as usual with the state (at Getvaccinated.Oregon.gov). When vaccines become available, those who have indicated an interest in getting shot at the dump will be contacted to sign up for a time slot.
"Everyone coming in will be given a mask and a clothespin," the spokesperson explained. "The mask is for the protection of our staff as much as for the vaccinatee. The clothespin is our own invention. Not only does it help keep the mask in place, but it also reduces the ambient smell."
The spokesperson added, "Some in the community may have heard about our leaking methane, the powerful greenhouse gas that's been escaping through our faulty landfill cover. But nobody should be worried just because the federal EPA is investigating our failure to live up to our operating permit. Methane emissions only hurt the planet, not people."
As the press release says, "The landfill looks forward to serving the people of Yamhill County with the same disinterest we've shown for the past forty years..." or they would, if this weren't an APRIL FOOL!
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