As the summer season begins to wane, we need
to remind the myriad of tourists visiting our neighborhood that there is one
tourist attraction that goes uncited in the local literature. This is Mt. Trashmore or what is more commonly
called Riverbend Landfill.
For a mere $13 per car entry fee, visitors can
drive to the top of this mountain of trash and get a 360-degree panoramic view
of the Willamette Valley. They will also
be able to see our marvelous farms and vineyards, historic towns and grand
rolling hills (of course, they should remember that what they see can see them).
With a deep breath, visitors can inhale the scents
of garbage imported from the Portland Metropolitan area. If they have a discerning nose, they might be
able to distinguish between the aromas of Portland's waste and Hillsboro's
garbage. Tourists can set up a game with
their kids to see who can locate the greatest number of toxic chemical
containers, recyclable items, and compostables, all of which flow out of the
garbage trucks and local pickups only to be buried and blended together to form
this obnoxious landmark.
This excursion will also allow visitors to educate
themselves and their children about geography and the impacts that this
landfill, built on the banks of the Yamhill River, will have when it slides
into that river during the forthcoming 9.0 Cascadia Subduction Zone earthquake.
Wow, just one trip will expose our tourists to a vast
valley view, aroma therapy, geological futurism and the political power of a
Texas corporation.
Shush. On the other hand we would be much better
off if the landfill did not exist and its so-called virtues did not blemish our
farmland.
-- travel commentary by A. Hollander
